i can't believe aaron is leaving for NZ for five months.

on thursday night, stel and i attempted to walk to him house from the YCK mrt. smart as we are, we finally found it la. let me go into more details haha.

stel and i spent loads of time in causeway trying to get a gift for aaron. then, we took the train to YCK and took a walk instead of taking a bus. lol. as we walked we sang like the world was ours =X. finally finally, we reached lentor ave. we so happily walked in. and that's when the LOOP began. LOL.

we started from the countryside walk and we found a 47. we thought it was aaron's house so we were wondering whether to press the bell. but thankfully, we didn't. lol. and we walked and walked and walked, not to mention call aaron and ask for the directions. we walked pass all sorts of LENTOR at the lentor LOOP. lentor way, lentor vale, lentor st, lentor rd. but there was no LENTOR WALK. it was kind of scary in the dark la. lol. we even came into a path to a forest. lol. the best thing that happened there other than drinking two glasses of water, eating ice cream and looking around in aaron's house was that, there were lots of playgrounds there and there was one with swings. LOL. so, in our uniforms, stel and i sat on the swing. don't know if it was me or the swing, i nearly fell off xD. lol. then i told her, eh, if we continue to swing, we'll never find aaron's home. LOL. so we went off to fidn it again.

we asked many people for directions. but they all gave different directions. so we ended up walking round and round. until we finally came to LENTOR PLAINS and we found LENTOR WALK! lol. we were on the phone with aaron. and he could hear us scream in the neighbourhood. haha. so finally we reached his house. it was THREE storeys high =/. LOL. we watched the 9pm show there with ice cream and water like i said. then we went around in aaron's house. he got a computer in every room. lol. then stel said, let me take something for memory. lol. then she wanted to take his laptop. lol.

we even told him that we initially wanted to make the bookmark an 'ah lun' instead of 'aaron'. haha. then he said luckily you never.

his mom drove us back to the MRT station =)). i wonder how many calories i've lost. hee.

aaron, come back soon! LOL.

tired. is this the way?

i need courage!

i'm not so sure. after talking to asiah yesterday. like she said la. maybe it'd work? in need of advices =/.

i think i'm afraid to be realised as 'not-good-enough'. afraid to try? afraid that it'll be hard to back out? afraid that instead of making things better, ruining things? hah.

i hope i'd still want to try when i can finally decide to do it =/.

I. AM. SUCH. A. HYPOCRITE.

brothers.

lol. i just luRve brothers. haha. and my sister also la. obvious -.-".

omg. i never expected of all people joel saw me at sp with c k. the thing is, I DIDN'T SEE HIM! LOL. that's probably because xy wasn't around lol. i have never spotted him myself. lol it's always xy telling me that he's there. haha maybe it's because i DO NOT HAVE a brother radar.

AHHH!!! I MISS ONE E. I MISS MY BEST FRIEND. I MISS MY HONEY[pukes], I MISS MY SHIEWDEE!

sigh. can't imagine what's happening. crazy things. unbelievable things. unthinkable things. SUPERNATURAL things? haha. somehow things has changed in one way or another. all in this year ar. abit scary. haha.

things like... WOW. the computer doesn't interest me anymore. like how i LOST interest in going for training. like, how i decided to BACK OUT form the line dance comp. like how i realised that i'm GROWING CLOSER to the elder X-Jump! members. like how i realised that some friends can ATTITUDE you as and when they like. like how i HATE he person i used to have a good feeling about. like how BUSY everyone is BECOMING. like how someone can be so HONEST with me. like how i take homework as FIRST PIORITY. like how i feel like a CHANGED person.

all the above, good or bad, i DO appreciate them.

lost in my own world. nothing much for me to look forward to. but i'd live my days HAPPILY. for myself.

afraid.

sigh. i don't even know why i always start a post with a sigh.

perhaps it's being in the same project work group as LEEKAHLIANG.

perhaps is having somre SO CALLED friend attituding me.

perhaps it's my DEADLY injured finger.

or is it perhaps that i'm having no training ground?

but i can say i feel truly happy that there're still people in the world who cares, people who treats me nicely. people whom give me securities and the feeling of stableness. and suddenly remembering that i have tons of bros and sis too.

after talking to them yesterday, i have the feeling/desire to really build up X-Jump! even though we're not going into comps or wadever. it's just the working together, doing what we want to do but it can be in Singapore too. haha. it's just being with who you want to be with, doing what you want to do and not making it big? making it big is not really the most important point for US. i believe it's US. haha. i think they've alkl got the same opinion with me? hope so.

choir was okae today. just hope that tianwei and weiling gets in. eunice too.

haha. HAPPY BD, eugene da ge! LOL. i think yu're taller than me already =((. lol.

oneE'05, X-Jump! spirited together. always.

i luRve home E!~

i luRve miss LIM! jiani!!! she bought marshmellows for us to put on our hot chocolate! LOL. i feel much for hardworking this year seriously. hardly come online once reach home. and kind of like although feeling like ponning in the morning but always feel better after i get out of my bed.

tell me i shouldn't care for a friends being. tell me i should just leave he or she to vanish. tell me i shouldn't just swallow what they say and let them be. tell me i should just quarrel with them and never talk to them ever again.

fine. ignore me. scold me. attitude me. wadever. do you seriously think i would care?!

i feel so bad, seriously.

he's so good to me. he cares about how i actually feel. he wants to know my needs. he wants to know about me. he notices every single little thing i do even the small little change of expression.

YET.

i can't treat him the same way. it feels weird. hah.

focus. have to focus on X-Jump! i really hope we can get something out of it. but nowadays i feel as if we're not there anymore, even spiritually. everyone is busy with their own thing. and i'm VERY VERY distracted from the sport. sigh.

been sleeping alot lately. don't know what's wrong with me. bleah.

sorry.

haiz. CCA open house over. dragged quite a few people into choir. haha.

sian. life is so boring in twoENDURANCE. but it seems to be better already. although we're so very "unBONDED". but would anyone like want to bond? it's like last year the streaming was like so... and they expect us to bond again? like anyone would do that. yay! eunice trying for choir! i hope she gets in!

lots of news about rope skipping nowadays. kind of shocked me but at the same time i don't know whether to be happy or disappointed. ah, wadever.

JER! coach me school la. LOL.

fantasizing~ =))

BUSY.

you don't know. but maybe. i do like you.

sigh. can i delete the last post?

it's not totally bad afterall. But. it still is bad okae? Sigh. Starting to miss all my ex-classmates. WENJUNJIE!!! =/. LOL. but i do feel like a senior when i stood outside oneE with stel they all. LOL. and the "explosion" teacher. LOL. it was weird having juniors. =/ But it's a nice feeling too. hee.

yay!! i got into welfare! the slackiest comittee. and i'm gonna be the slackiest member. afterall i DID the CLASS DIARY before okae [gumbles away]! my class' okae. but not my FT. NO WAY! sigh. still getting adjusted to new life. =/ unknown to almost half of my NEW classmates.

really miss my formal class. sigh. and it's so unfair. stel's class is beside and opposite to GREENTEAman's class. argh. and why do i always have to see some STELLA LOVER at the corridor near my class. IT SO UNFAIR! lol.

new year, new life. not brooding okae.

just dropped by.

to ANNOUNCE that.

I HATE TWO ENDURANCE.