he didn't care. neither did he believed her.

maybe i should stay away from my blog until after my cloudy mind clears. because i realized i tend to become too crazy into trying to make sense to myself. =x.

lit is a total, disaster. i didn't know how i crapped a page and a half. but i did, anyway. and other people write even longer la. =/. also wasn't really in the mood today. was choir perf during assembly, sang real badly. ms chung is leaving. how would we have the mood to sing? and i just stared into space and be in a daze for at least 3 times today, it was totally out of nothing. but i started to do it and i swear that my mind really went BLANK. just blank. and then maybe someday i would start hallucinating or something? who knows?

i feel as if i'm starting to block out everyone. i feel so guilty whenever someone talks to me and i just ignore or snap back at them. i did not mean to. but.. i just wanted to be alone. i try so much to tell myself not to be mean. but i just do so. and.. nevermind. i guess i just let too many emotions rule over me.

what does it take to make one realize if he or she has hurt another person, be it a friend or an enemy? why does pride always get in the way? is it really more important than to treasure what you have? will it be right to treat enemies cruelly after they had done the same to you? why regret only after you've made the choice?

why can't i just wake up one day and think that everything's gonna be alright? because the DONE are irreversible. if they are, it will prevent so many heartbreaks, so many regrets, so many angish stuff. if they are, there will be no IF. i no longer hope for things to be alright. i just seek understanding. for someone else to understand me. i tried. and i will still care, no matter how many times you turn away from me.

Three precious words. ;Three meaningful words. ;Three simple words.
but he never said it back to her.